Growing up in the sports world tough love was all I knew.  Merriam-Webster dictionary defines tough love as; love or affectionate concern expressed in a stern or unsentimental manner (as through discipline) especially to promote responsible behavior.  

Here's the deal with tough love... when you're raised in an environment where love is tough, it shapes your perception of love as always being tough. Does that resonate? If not, take a moment to reread it slowly.